What a bloody joke.

The newspapers reported today about the Government’s plan [that they are already tengah doing] to incorporate JAWI onto all signboards to boost tourism. Urgh, I actually feel choked up in my throat when I think of all the retorts I have!

1. Why the hell are they wasting money on this crap?

2. Who the hell is getting “under the table” money this time?

3. In 2006 it was reported by Gulf News that 147,646 tourists from Middle Eastern countries visited Malaysia last year. They expected a growth of about 40% and so probably [let’s be generous] 500,000 Middle Eastern Tourists came in 2007. In 2005 the total number of tourist arrivals in Malaysia was 16.43 million. So… 500,000 out of 16.4 Million. 0.03% Big WHOOP DEE DOO. Yet, Malaysia has decided that they are the most important tourists to our country. They generate money apparently.

Yes, even though 26% of the 27 million population in Malaysia are Chinese, I don’t see chinese words on every signboard. Yeah, my math is not brill, but I’m sure that’s more than 300,000. Even 8% of 27 million – the Indian community, would surely outnumber 300,000 tourists. Where’s the tamil on those signboards? So these tourists count more than we do? WHY? Why are people surprised that Chinese people and Indian people are migrating? Apparently, our tax money, doesn’t generate more than 500,000 tourists a year. Apparently the fact that we live here 365 days a year and not 2 weeks, doesn’t freaking matter either.

4. What bloody country gives up their own identity for tourists anyway? You MORONS, they are here to see, us, our culture, our history. We don’t go to Tokyo/Bangkok/any damn country to read Malay on the signboards there! Nobody comes here for those reasons either! You don’t see Egypt building the bloody Great Wall of China for tourists! Tourism is even more important in that country! Tourism isn’t even our main source of revenue!!!!!!!!!!!

5. Updating signboards with jawi? HOW ABOUT MAKING SURE THEY ARE ADEQUATE IN THE FIRST PLACE??? How many times do we not see bloody signboards cause they are placed way to far away from the actual turning, or they are hidden by some tree, or because they aren’t even there? Actually, HOW ABOUT USING THE MONEY TO COVER UP ALL THE POTHOLES AND FIXING THOSE BLOODY NOT WORKING TRAFFIC LIGHTS OR STREETLAMPS?

6. How about boosting tourism by preserving the natural beauty of some of the best tourist spots. Rather than building freaking ugly plaster fake treeS/mushrooms/whatevers that do double duty as rubbish bins or chairs or so called rest areas, or like blocking up a natural waterfall within a cave like the one in Kedah, or like clearing the rubbish at most of our touristy spots? OR like letting couples hold hands or cuddle in KLCC and not fear for their lives that some hard-up jerk will come and saman them for doing absolutely nothing?!

ARRRGGGGHHHHHH Malaysia pisses me off!!!!!!!!!!!

Thank god I’m registered to vote this year, cause obviously any choice is better than what we have now! I’d vote a donkey into Parliament.

I’m pretty sure the signboard pointing towards our Dewan Negara says [IDIOTS].

Year of the Rat and Nude Chicks!

Gong Xi Fa Cai! Just got back from my hometown ๐Ÿ™‚

Managed to come home with fewer scars and bruises than last year, so “Yeay!” me :).
(By scars and bruises, I mean “Wah! So fat!” and “Wah! Not working yet!” comments.)

Did get a killer “I think you should go for body wrapping to slim your tummy down” never-ending-3-minute-monologue from my cousin though.

Anyway, this year’s Chinese New Year topic dujour, has to be the 12 Edison Chen, Bobo Chan, Gillian Chung, and (oh my god! She’s so damn hot) Cecilia Chung. Poor EDC though, all the friendly comments about him having less than desired. ๐Ÿ˜‰ Since I’ve seen them, might as well say, I kinda agree. Hoping its some sort of optical illusion though.

Am I getting a whiff of ENORME?

The latest thing that’s making Nick and I laugh LOL, ROFL etc etc… is this clip from 30 Rock Season 2.

Can’t remember what episode it is.. but its basically one where Jane Krakowski’s character has gained a lot of weight, and she had to this hilarious sketch in which she goes roller disco skating, falls down, and shouts “Me want foOOooOOOood”, she gets a whole bunch of fans. Clearly my motto since 2006. Gotta get the shirt!

Anyway, Jenna becomes so popular that she’s hired to be the spokesperson of ENORME (pronounce Ee Nor Mehh), the number one perfume for plus sized women. Tagline : Let him chase the chunk!

… a rose by any other name?

So we all know celebs go nuts and give their baby’s random names all the time.

Check out these…

Frank Zappa / Gail Zappa –
Dweezil (son)
Moon Unit (daughter)
Diva Muffin (daughter)

Shannyn Sossamon / Dallas Clayton Actress –
Audio Science (son)

Sylvester Stallone –
Sage Moonblood (daughter)

But then… we mustn’t forget to give a shoutout to some killer Chinese parents who decided to have some fun. ๐Ÿ™‚

For e.g.

I came across an unfortunate chinese woman whose name was

Soo Bee Chee. w. t. f. Hahahaha…

Then… the very tragic dude named

Chee Ting

Then… there’s the almost mythical name of some kid called

Beh Boon Kia

AND let’s not forget some of the names people choose to go by

Rain (the bf),

Rainbow (the gf)

Nokia (girl)

Shadow (guy)

There’s also a clinic in Old Town that always makes me giggle

Klinik Panicker

and I know I’m childish but a restaurant called

Kam Fatt

ROFL Jan 2008

Hahaha.. Been watching 30 ROCK. Super killer line today.

“Donaghy Estates’s [wine] tastes like the urine of Satan after a hefty portion of asparagus“.

Hahahaha…

I’m so gonna describe the next horrible drink I have as that!

Second line:

“What kinda plane do you wanna buy?”

“Clear. Like Wonder Woman’s.”

WTF???

Anyway, this is my current Beh Tahan list

Britney. Yuck. McThorny. Yuck. Jenny. Yuck.

And after all that, this is the Cuci Mata list


Also… Congratulations Sister. It’s now confirmed you’re gonna be Wong Cher Hoong. Hahaha..

Poor confused fella… :)

My family is pretty kiasu bout boardgames.

Merajuking. Tantrums. Arguments. Mata Jeling. Tears. Blood. Sweat.

All over boardgames.

I mean, heck, my sis and I had a book that tallied the number of times we played Monopoly and who won or lost. [Seriously.] [I mean it, seriously.] ๐Ÿ™‚

Anyway, keeping to the tradition, my 13-year-old brother and I are now battling over Scrabble and when my sister is around, Monopoly and Uno.

Sometimes, J joins us.

That’s when “Confusion” personified arrives. ๐Ÿ™‚

Example 1. Scrabble.

J “helps” my brother with a “brilliant” new word…

????? Hahaha.

Example 2. Monopoly.

The dice are thrown…

and J shouts “11!!!”

Not just once but at least 5 times. FIVE times. ๐Ÿ™‚

Example 3. We move on to UNO.

J’s card is

My brother places the next card

and… J places this card down. ๐Ÿ™‚

Damn bloody cute!